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January 12, 2006 (Washington Post)
A Special Place in New Governor's Parade Disability Community To Be in the Spotlight
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In 2002, Martha J. Toomey delivered a tearful,scathing speech to the Virginia Disability Commission in Richmond, lambasting the state's services for the disabled.

Commission Chairman Timothy M. Kaine, Virginia's Democratic lieutenant governor, listened quietly to the 49-year-old Orlean resident.

Then "he double-dared me to come back to Fauquier and do something," Toomey said.

Six months and $30,000 in seed money later, Toomey answered Kaine's challenge by establishing Mary's Family. The "respite" service allows parents to leave their disabled children with professional and volunteer caregivers one Saturday a month, giving the parents time to tend to their own needs.

As Kaine prepares to move into the governor's mansion, he hasn't forgotten Toomey. On Saturday, Mary's Family will be one of three dozen groups represented in Kaine's
inaugural parade in Williamsburg.

That Mary's Family will be marching alongside the Daniel Boone Wilderness Trail Association, the VMI Corps of Cadets and Vienna's Hai Hua Community Center is, Toomey hopes, a sign of newfound respect for the disabled.

"Tim is considered much beloved in the disability community," Toomey said. "He has gone to bat over and over again for the disability community. But the pressure's on. Now Tim Kaine is governor, and everybody expects miracles right away."

Jeff Kraus, a Kaine spokesman, said disability rights are "a cause close to the governor-elect's heart."

"Mary's Family is obviously a great organization that does just a staggering amount of work with families whose children have special needs," Kraus said. "And . . . those with special needs are part of Virginia and they should be represented as well."

In May 2003, Kaine volunteered at a respite day. While his staff talked with parents, Kaine "rolled up his sleeves and actually volunteered," Toomey recalled. He read books and talked with Caroline Elgin, now 12, who has cerebral palsy.

Caroline, who will be among the 65 representatives of Mary's Family -- including about 30 children -- participating in Saturday's parade, has been a Kaine fan ever since.

"I think she's the only person around that had a Tim Kaine sticker on the back of her wheelchair," said her mother, Carina.

For Middleburg's Angela Arellano and her husband, Bulmaro Gutierrez, marching through historic
Williamsburg will have extra significance:Gutierrez, who was born in Mexico, became a U.S. citizen Monday.

Arellano and Gutierrez, whose daughter, Emily, 6, has spina bifida, routinely take advantage of the monthly respite provided by Mary's Family.

"Sometimes I go grocery shopping, because it's not easy, or sometimes we go out to lunch and talk, orsometimes I come home and take a nap," Arellano said of her respite day. "Emily's great -- she's very sociable and lively -- but you have to have three hands, and I don't. Those are great days. We really appreciate that."

In an inconvenient twist, the parade falls on a designated respite day, but Toomey said the respite
will be offered as planned.

"We've never canceled," she said. "We've got moms who know that every second Saturday of the month they can go to work, and we're not going to jerk them around."

Toomey, whose 10-year-old son, Jeffrey McCord, has a seizure disorder, will be in Williamsburg smoothing out logistics of the group's trip:

The hotel must be alerted to special needs, including wheelchairs,service dogs and refrigerators for medicine. Location in the parade is crucial, Toomey said, because loud noises can upset the autistic children. Along the parade route, the children will be accompanied by baby goats, which are regular entertainment at respite days, and they will have colorful parachutes to help them stay focused and calm.

"I'm hoping that by asking us to represent the disabled community in the parade, they're also saying that people with disabilities will be represented in the state budget," Toomey said. "I'm hoping that this means that the future of Virginia includes everybody."

By Julia Feldmeier
Washington Post Staff Writer
Thursday, January 12, 2006
Loudoun section, page 3
© 2006 The Washington Post Company

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